Liam Maguren makes parental decisionmaking easier, combing through Neon’s wide selection of family films (so you don’t have to) these school holidays.
A good movie night makes any school holiday better, but one thing you don’t want is to scroll through Neon’s extensive family films section for half-an-hour unable to settle on one of the platform’s many choices while your microwaved popcorn gets cold.
We’re here to help you prep ahead of time with a no-nonsense breakdown of Neon’s best and newest offerings for the whole family.
The Super Mario Bros. Movie
The big ones
You can’t get much bigger than the world’s two biggest movies of last year. Barbie and The Super Mario Bros. Movie are streaming on Neon—the former focusing on the popular doll visiting the real world, the latter following the popular videogame character exiting the real world. Both films joined the USD billion-dollar club and even hit the music charts for What Was I Made For? and Peaches.
Other 2023 blockbusters for the youngsters include Wonka, which saw Timothée Chalamet as the enigmatic chocolate mogul, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem, a stylishly revamped take on the pizza-loving crime-fighters, and Migration, an original adventure from the studio behind Minions about a family of ducks taking their first long-haul flight together.
If you’ve got a PAW Patrol fan in the whānau, you’ll be obliged to watch PAW Patrol: The Mighty Movie on Neon (it may just catch you off guard with a number of its gags). Same goes for any Trolls enthusiast: the third film in the DreamWorks series, Trolls Band Together, is currently on the platform.
The Inventor
Lesser-known family flicks
Another DreamWorks film, Ruby Gillman, Teenage Kraken, didn’t make as much of a splash when it hit cinemas, so if you’re up for a unique mashing of Luca, The Little Mermaids, and Mean Girls, this could be worth a go. If that gets you in the mood for another nautical-themed animated comedy, Nickelodeon musical Under the Boardwalk features crabs voiced by Michael Cera and Keke Palmer who find themselves washed up at Jersey Shore.
Going even more obscure, charming stop-motion film The Inventor tells the story of Leonardo da Vinci (voiced by Stephen Fry)—that is, a very youngster-friendly side of this historical figure. Meanwhile, Mavka: The Forest Song mirrors our future with a story about a guardian of a forest’s soul and the choices she must make to defend it.
Five Nights at Freddy’s
For the older kids
Our tastes in movies change as we grow older, and the teenage years are perhaps the most significant for our film taste buds.
If your kid’s starting to get into horror, last year’s Five Nights at Freddy’s (rated R13) makes for a great entry point, based on the lore-heavy game series. Dungeons & Dragons: Honour Among Thieves is an excellent choice for any young fantasy nerd looking for a rowdy adventure with a little more maturity, and lots of immaturity (catch it before it leaves Neon on October 11). And for the motor heads, Gran Turismo tells the true story of a young man who went from gamer to professional driver thanks to the PlayStation series of the same name.
If you’d rather a film that’s not attached to any kind of IP, crowd-pleasing New Zealand flick Uproar offers something grounded and heartwarming. Hunt for the Wilderpeople star Julian Dennison expands his acting chops as a teenager in 1981 trying to find his place at a school—and its rugby team—that look down on him. Set in the backdrop of the protests against South African apartheid, the young man learns what it means to stand up for what is right, and how to find your voice.
Depending on your children’s ages, now might be a great time to introduce them to beloved blockbusters of yesteryear like 1997’s Men in Black and 1999’s The Mummy—if they’re all good with some goofy violence and slight scares.
Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse
Movie marathons
Look, you’ve got two weeks to cover. You can fit in a cheeky movie marathon, right?
You can start off light with a Wonka weekend, starting with the Gene Wilder classic (it leaves Neon 1 October) before taking on Tim Burton’s take and ending on the aforementioned Wonka.
If you can fit four films in, the original Indiana Jones trilogy and Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. (No Dial of Destiny here, sorry completionists.)
Prepared to go five films deep? Give this bespoke Spider-Man-athon a try. Start with Sam Raimi’s original trilogy and jump ahead to the two Spider-Verse films—they’re all on Neon.
Oh, your family’s ready to jump into the deep end, eh? Well, buckle in, couch potatoes, because you can watch all eight Harry Potter films on the platform as well as all the Mission: Impossibles.
Over the Hedge
Personal favourites
Indulging in my own opinions here, you’ll find on Neon one of my favourite comedies ever, Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs, as well as its sequel, which is noticeably not as good but still has some neat, whacko ideas about food as species.
You’ll also find the third Madagascar film which, in my view, is easily the funniest and most inventive of the lot. Shrek and Shrek 2 are certified classics that hold up with their witty warping of fairy tales and there’s a special place in my heart for DreamWorks’ Over the Hedge—if you can get past its very 2006 look, this critters-on-the-loose comedy runs purely on Looney Tunes mania.
